This weekend marked the 85th Academy Awards, a time of pageantry and accomplishment, and I’m reminded of when Fred Rogers (1928-2003) won a Lifetime Achievement Award at the 1997 Daytime Emmys. His words shed light on the part of any awards show that’s most often rushed.
The thank yous.
There was no soft-spoken sweater switcheroo this time. For
all his gentle ways, Mr. Rogers was there in black tie and tux, reminding us grownups
that his words still had power and conviction and authority, that he was still
who we always believed he was—a velvet wrapped brick of a man.
In a simple 15-second message, Mr. Rogers drove home that no
success story is created in a vacuum. That all of us, bootstrap pullers though
we are, have a long legacy of people we need to thank.
Esquire magazine’s Tom Junod describes the experience.
Mister
Rogers went onstage to accept the award—and there, in front of all the soap
opera stars and talk show sinceratrons, in front of all the jutting man-tanned
jaws and jutting saltwater bosoms, he made his small bow and said into the
microphone, “All of us have special ones who have loved us into being. Would
you just take, along with me, ten seconds to think of the people who have
helped you become who you are. Ten seconds of silence.”
And
then he lifted his wrist, looked at the audience, looked at his watch, and
said, “I'll watch the time.”
There
was, at first, a small whoop from the crowd, a giddy, strangled hiccup of laughter,
as people realized that he wasn't kidding, that Mister Rogers was not some
convenient eunuch, but rather a man, an authority figure who actually expected
them to do what he asked.
And
so they did.
One
second, two seconds, three seconds—and now the jaws clenched, and the bosoms
heaved, and the mascara ran, and the tears fell upon the beglittered gathering
like rain leaking down a crystal chandelier.
And
Mister Rogers finally looked up from his watch and said softly “May God be with
you,” to all his … children
Who do you need to thank?
Who has helped you become who you are?
Would you take 10 seconds with me now, give yourself to the
moment and to the task, and make a short list.
In no particular order, here’s an extremely short version of
mine …
Educators:
To David Kopp, my friend and university journalism professor who kept me wanting to be there, to Murray Chalmers, my high school English teacher who spurred me forward, and to Dr. Shelly Cunningham at graduate school who once wrote on a paper, “Your writing deserves to find a wider audience,” thank you.
Spiritual leaders:
To pastor Tim Johnson, who’d talk to me about everything under the sun, to Camp Firwood directors Mike Johnson and Darell Smith, thank you for showing me a world more alive than I’d ever imagined.
Mentors:
To Lt. Buck Compton, who offered an example of a man who led well. Thank you.
Closest friends:
To Bob Craddock, you’re the greatest. Karen Clark, you are the sister I never had. Thank you.
Family:
To my parents, I’m grateful to have 2 people who loved me unconditionally along the way. You approached life like you were on my side, not on my back. Also to my in-laws, and my brother and his family. Family is most important, and thanks for being a great one.
Colleagues:
To my door-opening literary agent Greg Johnson. In the words of Rod Tidwell to Jerry Maguire, you are my ambassador of kwan. Thank you.
Wife and children:
To Mary Margaret, Addy, Zach, and baby X, you mean more to me than you’ll ever know. The words “thank you” don’t come close enough to expressing my gratefulness for you.
There are so many
more people I could list. My friends in high school and college and at camp
and at jobs along the way. My relatives. My pastor now. The guys I meet with
regularly. The writers and thinkers and leaders and artists who I’ve never
known but who’ve influenced anyway. So many people to thank.
So many people help you become who you are.
Read about the WWII Marines who fought in the Pacific in the new book,
—VOICES OF THE PACIFIC—
By Adam Makos with Marcus Brotherton
Available
April 2, 2013. Ask for it at a bookstore near you, or preorder your copy HERE.
Your turn. Who has helped you become who you are? Use the comment section below to write your short list.
9 comments:
Tracie, Jacob, Isaiah, Kate. Frank Gray, Ken Roth, Bill and Lisa Winter, Tom and Mary Helbig. Darren Patrick and team, Tim Parcel, Jeremiah Stutte. I could go on an on and on
I wonder if the Murray Chalmers who taught you English and inspired you is the same Murray Chalmers who taught me English and inspired me. As a fellow Canadian, I wouldn't be surprised. Thanks for the thoughtful reminder to appreciate the people who helped shape my life.
@ Ed, Murray Chalmers taught me English at Mt. Boucherie Senior Secondary School near Westbank, (now West Kelowna) BC. He also was the rugby coach. I graduated in 1986.
You?
I graduated from Mt. Boucherie in 2001. Prior to taking his class I loved reading but he instilled a love of literature. He was definitely one of the best teachers I ever had. (Although now I feel the need to exhaustively proofread this comment. He was after all, my English teacher!)
I'm glad that Mr. Chalmers had such a positive impact on you. If you ever run in to Mr. Chalmers, you can tell him "hello" and "thank you" from me!
Great job on the blog. You have posted some excellent material.
There are many people I need to thank. Here are but three.
My English teacher Mr. Gibner
My youth pastor Rick South
My father
Thanks for this post Marcus. If the ten seconds I took to think your name came to mind. Thanks for being one of my spiritual mentors when I was in high school and for continuing to pour into me even though its no longer a part of your job description.
Thanks Danny, much appreciated.
Marcus: Another very nice viewing to read and think. Lynne and I had great parents in which we miss but remember our journey with them.
I had teachers in Illinois, Vince Laird, Coach Ray Fritsch, Uncle Walt who was in the army and moved to a tail gunner in the Mitchell B 25 and sent to Australia soon after the war started. He was with the early squadrons who flew missions to halt the movement of Japanese into Australia and other Islands. He remained for additional flights before his release in early 1945. In college, Vern Warkentin gave me a job upon arriving at Reedley College and the additional money sure helped + being a very nice person. His son Don is my current President of my college and also a great friend. Jim Bennett who taught Biology with me and we worked many years together when were both young. I cannot list the students I have taught who remain friends with some since my first class in 1959. This is truly a blessing and fortunate to have such great memories with stories of each. I will list my first who is my wife Lynne and Best Friend.
Ralph Peterson who is my 90 year old neighbor who is funny and was on the second Yorktown from the time it left Norfolk until the end of WW II. He is my former Principal, neighbor with wife Ruth, and friend. We drive them to dinners and occasions around the Valley and a former trip to hawaii.Everyone should know Ralph.
Gary
My grandfather - my mother's father, a tall and lanky WWII veteran, who adored his family, loved sporting a fedora, and was considered a fun loving gentleman
My father - literally born on an ironing board, the oldest of five children, who grew up in a hurry with manly responsibilities after his father left the family upon returning from the war
My uncle Junior - a bachelor until his death, a man of hard work, grit, and Independance...Never one for lengthy conversation, he spoke with his back, his hands, and the sweat upon his brow.
The three certainly were/are different - one of mischievous class, an overachiever, and man of solitude...each I am, have been, or aspire to be at some point and/or time of my life.
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